Yep, this is me...

My mom and me. Maybe 1979 or 1980.

Yep, this is me...

Yep, this is me... I complain about sensitive people, but really I am just as sensitive. Yep, this is me... I hate having pictures taking of me, because I hate seeing how fat I am. Yep, this is me... I really want to be healthy, but I can't wait to have the new Twinkies (It's a go: Operation Twinkie-gluttony with secret agent Elle).

Yep, this is me... I struggle being comfortable with who I really am with God, others, and myself. Yep, this is me... I think I'm a really awkward/nerdy person, and don't really know how to have one on one conversations.

Yep, this is me... I love laughing and having a good time, but I struggle with enjoying the moment. Yep, this is me... I still am trying to figure out who I am, and I'm 40 years old. Yep, this is me... I struggle with getting older, even though I told myself I never would. Yep, this is me... I am pissed off that some people think being 40 and older makes you unmarketable and unemployable.

Yep, this is me... I call people out for being selfish, but I am the most selfish person I know. Yep, this is me... I almost blew it with my wife many years ago, and have done this several times since. Yep, this is me... I wish I could be a romantic person, but I think being romantic is weird. Yep, this is me... I tell people that I don't care what they think of me, and get really worried that I don't care.

Yep, this is me... I can have a tendency to not let people into my trust circle. Yep, this is me... I can also have the tendency to let the wrong people into my trust circle. Yep, this is me... I can over promise and under deliver. Which makes me work even harder in the end, with the result of burnout. Yep, this is me... I am a lazy person, but cover up my laziness with over working.

Yep, this is me... I struggle with the American church, but I'm afraid to voice my opinion too loud. I have too much to lose. Yep, this is me... I struggle with consistently reading the Bible and praying. Yep, this is me... I more often than not live in fear of man, instead of the fear of God.

Yep, this is me... I am worried about people reading this and using what I have posted here against me.

You know what though... Despite all my failures, weaknesses, and insecurities; God will continue to use me. God isn't finished with me; he is only just beginning.

We all need to get over ourselves.

We'll never be good enough, perfect enough, or having things exactly the way we want them to be. AND that is okay. God has extended grace to us through Jesus, so that we can live life to it's fullest.

Life is too short to not enjoy it; so Enjoy it!

Joe (Submitted to the Weekly Writing Challenge: A Pinch of You)